Thursday, May 31, 2007

Response from Amy Baione


The following is one of the most potent, powerful, prayerful responses I've ever received to one of my reflections. I feel so fortunate to receive thoughtful responses from all of you. This one I just had to ask permission of the author to share on the "Queen Mab Contemplates" blog site.

Read Amy's words, and then ask yourself, "What would the world look like if we really had this sort of attitude or perspective toward our partners, spouses, lovers? What would the nature of our homes be? How would our children benefit?"

I don't think there would be war. Honestly. The Middle East, and our Urban Centers, North Korea and Darfur: they would all be experiencing a revolution of LOVE! Yes! My dear Boston friend is communicating something that reeks of the secret to love and lasting, transformative happiness.

From: "Amy Baione"
Date: May 31, 2007 1:04:29 PM CDT
To: "Melissa Borgmann"
Subject: Re: Post-Mo Contemplation: Encountering Poetry Alone vs. in Partnership

Melissa Borgmann writes:
And this makes me sort of wonder, "What happens when I get married? Will this part of myself that I so love - and so loves God - and that I believe makes my life sort of mean something and worthwhile, will she disappear when I become a wife and full-time partner?"

And your writing, thinking, questioning this makes me sort of wonder, "Why have I felt so alone in feeling sadness over the loss or atrophy of the me-ness I remember from my single days?" It was the me that loved the questions and had the opportunity--actually maybe it's just more time-- to work through their mystery in a sweet, silent dialogue between one me and another me--maybe the earthly me and the transcendent me, I'm not sure.

But before I start passing by reality on the grief train I so love to ride sometimes, I meditate, Melissa, on the reality that the best moments in my life so far as a nearly 33-year-old woman have come within the last 3 years, the years of my marriage, my awesome, scary, strong, rickety, unique and universal marriage to a friend-lover-stranger-father-son-brother-flawed-perfect man. These moments can be few and far between, but when they happen they are truly divine. They happen when (after having carved out some retreat within the constant-exchange-that-is-marriage for tuning into me and the evolution of my thoughts) I savor him and look on him with kind eyes and we talk as though we really love and cherish one another--I mean soul exchange...which in the best, best moments leads to no talking at all. ; )

I mean every last bit of what I just said, and you're going to be okay no matter what.


1 comment:

Melissa Borgmann said...

And on Thursday, August 6, 2009, two years after I originally posted this, and four days after Francois Xavier Kiemde has proposed to me, I am in awe. I am quieted. I am still. I am overjoyed contemplating the experience of then, with this moment now: loving all facets of self and the evolution of relationship. It's just something to note. Love to Amy. Love to any and all who have found their way to this page, searching for something.